And I cannot wait another year

I always thought January 2nd was the most depressing day of the year. The holidays are over, I feel bloated and gross from drinking too much every day, not going to the gym consistently, and shoveling all kinds of wonderful, terrible foods into my maw for the last two weeks; the days are short and cold, it's back to work, and the only thing I have to look forward to is the acknowledgement in a few weeks that I'm now another year older.


Perfect.

Then I woke up this morning on my first official day back to work (I took yesterday off; I needed the extra day to brace myself for the onslaught) and discovered that January 3rd was really going to be the bitch, because it was 10 degrees outside. And now, a few hours later, it's a whopping 14.

Oh, and I gained 4 lbs over the holidays.


But all whining aside, I think 2008 is going to be a good year. Maybe even a great year. I don't know why this is; it might be something as simple as the fact that it's an even year. (I highly doubt that it has anything to do with the fact that I turn - shudder - 31 in a few weeks.) There's good stuff in the works, though: I'm working on being more financially responsible. I've been thinking more and more about writing a book. I've settled into an acceptable rhythm at work, but I'm becoming increasingly drawn to the idea of leaving my company and ditching this nuthouse, though I know in my heart that I'll only be trading one form of crazy for another.

Just like I do every year, I drew up a set of New Year's resolutions. They include everything from the staggeringly cliched (cut back on drinking, drop 15 lbs, and hit the gym more regularly) to the mindnumbing minutiae of everyday life (get new glasses; go for a physical; cancel the MasterCard that I never use).

The one thing I didn't mention was love. I'm certainly not giving up on the idea, but I think I'm finally beginning to realize that it just might not be in the cards for me, at least not now, and that's okay. While the romantic side of me likes to think that there really is a lid for every pot, the jaded realist is quietly pointing out that there are people all over the world who never find love.

Bad Robot posted something recently that I thought was really great and insightful; he was talking to his mom and she said...well, I'll just quote it directly instead of trying to paraphrase poorly:

One thing my mom said to me the other night, as I was talking with her about
some of the stuff going on in my life, was about how people perceive you (or,
me, in this case). And she pointed out how valuable it is to just be a strong,
healthy person, as often what people are looking for is not so much what you
give them, but what you can be for them. And if I am a strong, healthy person,
that makes me reliable and dependable and desirable to be with and around. I
think I've focused so much on what I wanted or needed or what I could
specifically give or provide to others that I overlooked the ephemeral nature of
all those things.

I think that's perfect. And a great way to put 2008 resolutions in perspective.

Happy New Year, all.